Friday, May 20, 2011

Accutane

This was the toughest delivery yet for Captain Richard. He had handled any number of breech births and umbilical strangulations, but this was just plain weird. The smoothness of the skin reminded him of the perfect first-ice on Lake Winthrop during his service time in the Ashland Militia. The thing that slid into his hands from the Terrible Vagina was more like an eggplant with a face than a human baby. Captain Richard will choose to not document that the smooth eggplant-being spoke to him before closing its milky little eyes.

Use the bathroom before you go to bed. Your bed is soaked in urine!

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