Sunday, August 31, 2003

Borage Seed Oil

Lines formed quickly outside the fire-gutted Macy's. Leonard, sitting on his Hindu-Matic "Anti-Stress" Stool in the warden's office, saw no need to let the old man know anything about what was to happen in little over an hour. From Warden Padich's office window, one could see the entire mallscape of the People's Plaza (PP). With the PP only three miles away from Incarceration Incorporated (Inc., Inc.), many of the prisoners talked amongst themselves about "getting a whiff" of a Cinnabon when the morning breeze would kick up.

To be continued, just like your nutritional desires!

Tuesday, August 26, 2003

Manganese (as manganese carbonate)

The ladies got real emotional at the Ron Howard memorial service. Henry Winkler gave a speech about his own struggle with the bottle; even letting on that he might be married to two people! And the party trays were to die for--what with all the different kinds of olives! I had no idea! I was the third to leave...right after Dr. Anaheim. I already want more of those olives.

Two years is nothing.

Sunday, August 24, 2003


Mars will be within arm's reach in two days and you have done nothing to prepare for it. Your Budd Hopkins Book-Club membership means less now than it did when you first met the RV sisters. Wednesday will come and go and you will have learned nothing. Your hand, full of red dust.

Buy a gun!

Saturday, August 16, 2003


There are institutions and there are institutions
And then there's what you believe
None of it makes any sense
Except for what you believe
And explaining that to yourself
Doesn't really get you anywhere

I can't even imagine how much this hurts!

Friday, August 15, 2003

Vitamin K

You use people like you use the paper towels at work
Never a thought to how many get tossed aside
But your hands are clean
And dry

Skin is the first line of defense!

Tuesday, August 12, 2003


Oh, carrot sticks!
I saw you running your mouth at Cafe-Cafe!
Susan may not be the best in hair but, oh my!
Army surplus is fashion, then it's not, and now it is again
Parachute pants are easy to take off (fuck-fuck)
I heard about your bout with fibromyalgia
I pretend not to climax because of your disease
I pretend that my body has loosened from its moorings
I pretend that everything's better in the morning
Oh, carrot sticks!

You feel awful for a reason!

Thursday, August 07, 2003

Flax Seed Oil

I heard about your little run-in with Mel Gibson. (six)
His shirts are almost always wrinkled. (nineteen)
Mel Gibson gets away with murder. (four)
There was that whole thing with your trip to Pup'n'Taco. (four)
And now his face is all over the news. (ten)
It is so hard to be good like Mel Gibson. (ten)
There is only so much a man can do. (four)
It was easier when there was no Mel Gibson. (six)
To keep you from walking out that door. (god)

A brisk walk outside is all you need!

Wednesday, August 06, 2003


a hitler salute is given toward the moon on a california summer night
tonight the new fascism has the red carpet rolled out for it
arnold is as much six letters as ronald
we are fucking doomed.

Please hide your weapons from the new military!

Tuesday, August 05, 2003


Thank you, little cactus
the sun can kill you
but not as fast as the sun
can kill me
has no impact on my decision
to stay in sunny southern California


Sunday, August 03, 2003


mr. runt seeks clarification on the FINLEY contract
seems someone's not doing (t)heir [(h)is or (h)er, to apply correct grammatology] job
is it (y)our department that needs looking into?
or will the problem fix (I)tself?

The sun is made out of vitamins!

Saturday, August 02, 2003


have some gin and think about why you would rather be playing video games than coming up with another goddamned nutrient of the day or whatever. start your sentence in lower case because you're e.e. bukowski. come back from vacation and have "inventory" heaped all about your feet and neck. more information about this error may be available in the server error log.

Your toes hold you to the ground!